This Land

The song says, “This land is your land, this land is our land.”  The words seem to have more meaning for me as time goes on.  Remembering the lessons of the legendary Johnny Appleseed who planted apple seeds after he would pluck a ripe apple from a tree has me thinking.

The concept is taking, but leaving for the next person.  Somewhere over the years I believe we have lost sight of the group and what is good for all, and we have spent more time concentrating on what is good for the individual.

I write a lot about being an individual.  I write a lot about taking care of us.  And, I am a strong believer in doing this.  I am equally a strong advocate of extending our hands and being there for our family, our friends, our community and the world we live in.

My grandparents had an extreme influence on me in developing a sense of pride in my heritage and the land they came to from what was referred to as the ‘old country’.

When I see people toss things out of their car onto the streets.  When I see people leave cans and bottles on a public wall.  When I see people finish something and not replace it for someone else.  IT MAKES ME NUTS!

Do you appreciate what was planted and left for you?  Do you plan on doing the same for the next generation?

Balance

If only finding balance was this easy and fun

There is no question that our world has become more complicated.  While many are enjoying a longer life, and a healthier lifestyle, we are also more stressed and frustrated than ever before.

Finding the balance isn’t always easy.  Children are over scheduled, parents seem over worked and most people try to fit 25 hours into a

24-hour day.

I have talked with many friends on what it means to find the middle.  How do we all balance the many demands that are made on us, and the many demands we make on ourselves?

Bills do mount up.  Laundry does need to be done.  Homework has become so complicated that parental involvement is required.  Wanting to provide a nutritious meal and quality family time does require planning and patience.

At the end of a day there seems to be little time to really kick back and slow down.  I think for most people it is finding moments here and there to take a breath, and just relax.  And, as I write this, I think this has become a luxury.

Perhaps what we should do is schedule into our very busy lives a time each day where we can reflect.  Where we can be with our thoughts and just unwind. 

Sound like a good idea to you?

Bullies

It seemed like wasted words.  It didn’t even sound convincing to me.  So, how does it make a 10-year old feel better?

It went like this:  A kid started in calling names.  Trying to get others to keep the ball from him.  The 10-year old became a target of random bullying.  It happens all the time.  Teasing, picking on and bullying has been around since the beginning of time.

Parents say things like, “Just ignore it.”  Or, “You know it isn’t true.”  And then we add all the wonderful things the kid is.  This is all in an attempt to not allow the bully to ruin the day, ruin the mood, and ruin the spirit of our children.

Life isn’t easy.  Bullies come in all ages and at various times of our life.  I know people in there 50s who are still affected by things said to them in grade school and during their middle and high school years.  And those who deal with the adult version in their work place.

There really aren’t any answers to this age-old problem.  Kids who are kind and sensitive will never understand why them.  Just like kids who can roll with the punches and blow it off will never understand why it is a big deal.

We can legislate food, drugs and safety laws.  What we can’t legislate is kindness.  That, my friends is something we should teach our children, our grandchildren and yes, even the adults in our lives.

Thoughts?  Share stories?

Elevating Others

I seem to be hearing more conversations like this. “That driver just flipped me off because I tapped the horn.  Would he have preferred I let him hit me?” Or, “I turned a corner at the market and didn’t see her, until she yelled at me about being rude.  I simply didn’t see her.”

Instead of focusing on the above, I have also been the recipient of some very nice words.  A family friend said my blogs have meaning for her.  She finds value in what I say.  My beautiful daughter-in-law called me yesterday just to say she was thinking about me and loves me.

While I was listening to some friends last night talk about the lack of respect and complete disregard for others I shared some of the nice conversations I had been exposed to.

The mood of the group changed.  We all went from telling annoying stories of people to positive ones.  We all went from complaining to complimenting.  The mood of the room went from a downhill spiral to a feeling of elevation.

Is your mood going up or down today?

My thoughts these past few weeks have been taken with the very thought of simple kindness, sharing positive thoughts, and complimenting others. 

Anger and aggression is contagious.  Just think of mob rule.  Equally as contagious is a smile and a laugh.  If you had a choice of whom you would want to spend time with?  A grumpy old….  Or a giggling baby…

Which would it be?

Which one are you?

Bottom of the 6th.

Last night at dinner the discussion of my mother came up.  My mother is in an assisted living place and in her late 80s.  Around the table we had my grandson who is 10, a handful of 20 and 40 year-olds, my ex-husband, his wife and my son’s in-laws.

The reason I list all the above is to show the wide range of ages we have going on.

My ex-husband asked how my mother was doing.  I used a phrase that my brother uses (a baseball family, we are).  “She’s doing great for someone in the 9^th inning.”

My grandson looked up at me with concern.  I said, “Well, Travis, I am in the 7^th inning (again, we are a sports family).”  Without even blinking he said, “Naw, Grandma, bottom of the 6^th.”  He then went back to playing on his hand-held device.

I have been thinking about this.  We are all somewhere in this journey called life.  We can all look behind and we can all look ahead.  Hopefully we do this with fond memories, and great future memories to come.

I have to constantly remind myself that it isn’t the time we spend living, it is the quality of our time here.  I don’t believe it is as important to be in over-time as it is to make each inning of our lives ones that have meaning and worth.

And, these are my thoughts on this beautiful Friday morning.  You?

The Game Called Life

In what my brother would refer to as the ninth inning of a person’s life, I will cop to only the 7^th inning of mine.  I am still learning things about myself that honestly makes me smile.  Well, perhaps laugh is more appropriate.

I was led to believe that we become more set in our ways, as we get older.  I am finding the opposite to be true of myself.  I am less affected by change than I thought.  The small things that used to annoy the hell out of me have actually become small things.

This is very personal, as I understand not everyone flips this way.  I am becoming more patient (still a work in progress).  I am learning to be a better listener (although I am far from where I would like to be).  And, I am always striving to NOT take myself so serious (I do a fairly good job here).

When I look at the long haul of my life and not the day-to-day challenges I am pleased.  When I see where I started and how far I have come, I feel good.

Although we all go through life with our own script and each of our journeys is unique to us, we share many common threads.  For the most part, I believe we want to live a life of purpose.  We want to understand the world we life in.

I know for me this isn’t always simple or easy. I do know however, as long as I am in the game I will continue to check myself on a regular basis to see how I am doing in my awareness, growth and overall happiness factors.

How about you?

Individuality

I wanted a pair of stretch pants.  I was 13 and all my friends were getting them.  I didn’t particularly like them, however, all my friends were buying them.  I came home from school and asked my dad if I could have a pair.

He asked me one question.  It was, “Why do you want them?”  I had only one answer, “All the other girls were getting them.”  I got an answer that I didn’t understand then; however I do now.  “No! “ It was followed with a rather lengthy lecture about following the pack. Making my own choices.  Individuality as opposed to a group-thinking mentality.

I am pretty sure I hated my dad at that moment.  And many would say fitting in was important to young people and my dad was unreasonable.  Certainly at 13 I felt that way.

But now?  I have to agree with good old dad.  We are more and more a society that follows.  We get on bandwagons not because we necessarily have done our homework or because we agree, but more so because it seems like everyone else has joined in.

I find it interesting that we value the opinions of stars and people who are in the public rather than our own instincts and views.

I know this isn’t true of everyone and in every circumstance. 

I believe that is it okay to NOT follow the pack; what do you think?