I received an email from a
friend of many decades. It simply said,
“Was your last blog about our relationship?”
It was the one where I wrote about hurt feelings and keeping score.
I assured her she wasn’t the
subject. Then I asked her why she
thought I was referring to her. She
thought that since we have had issues over the years, she just wanted to
check. Please, is there anyone out
there who has not had spats and misunderstandings with family or friends?
She then went on to say that
if I was writing about her, she wanted to take a look at her own behavior to
see if there is anything she should perhaps do differently.
I thought about this on and
off throughout the day. Instead of her
becoming defensive, she actually held a mirror up to herself to see in what
ways she might be responsible. She also
didn’t stew about it; she asked me in a direct manner, looking for information,
not a fight or an argument.
How many people actually
self-assess? How many people really give
thought to their own actions when a situation goes badly? Perhaps if more of us did, we could defuse
situations rather than igniting them.
Something to think about.
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