Friday, January 17, 2014

That’s How I Feel

I received a call from a longtime friend of mine.  I have known her over 30 years.  Our friendship has always been rocky at best.  Our biggest problem stems from an expectation and then a disappointment.  It is usually over something small that seems to get blown out of proportion.

“I called you twice, you called me once.  I wrote two paragraphs, you answered with one word.”  The end result is she tends to feel that I am blowing her off.

How many times do you find yourself in a situation where someone is saying to you, “But that’s how I 'feel'", when his or her feelings are hurt, although that wasn’t your intention?,  Or perhaps you are the person who feels slighted?

Friendships, like relationships, take work.  Somewhere between the giving of the message and the receiving of the message is ‘tone, intent, and attitude’.  Or, more likely, it is  perceived ‘tone, intent, and attitude'.

I am not sure what the answer is.  I am not sure what the solution is.  I suppose the best way to handle any situation where someone is telling you how they feel is to listen to what they have to say.  Recognize they have a right to their feelings and then move on.

If you have a better idea, PLEASE share your thoughts.