Monday, November 11, 2013

Making Mountains Out of Mole Hills

Some people are experts in taking small problems and making them so much larger.  And, some people defuse a situation simply by NOT adding fuel to the fire.

Today I had what could have been an uncomfortable confrontation with a co-worker.  I had reason to be upset.  In my mind I was running through all the things I intended to ‘call her on’.  I was justified and although I knew this wouldn’t be pleasant, I was prepared to go to battle.

Instead of this issue becoming larger than it needed to be, my co-worker called me and simply said, “I understand you are bent.”  Instead of my going off on her, or even stating my issue, I simply said, “Yes.”  She then went on to talk through the situation with me.

She took some responsibility, and I shared in a calm, non agitated way why I was, in fact, ‘bent’.

I give her credit because instead of her becoming defensive, causing me to accelerate my anger, she defused the situation and we both were able to talk about a better way of communication in the future.

Would you say that you are the type of person who tends to agitate a situation or defuse it?

If getting our point across is our goal, don’t we have a better chance of being heard if the other person is not pushed into a corner or feeling attacked?

I think so.