Lemonade

It has always been my philosophy that when life hands you lemons, make lemonade.  And, I love the expression, “Want to give God a good laugh, make a plan.”

In reality the above seems wise and comforting when someone else is faced with challenges and real life decisions.  The truth is, they are both quite obnoxious, when the subject is us and someone or something is pulling the carpet out from under our feet.

I now find myself the object of this virtual carpet.  And, I am struggling to find the comfort in a glass of lemonade or making God laugh.

Having said that, I know the drill.  I muster up the courage, and I look at all before me with the knowledge and experience that when one door closes another one opens.

I am famous for saying, “Life is a journey”.  I am famous for saying many positive, life-affirming catch phrases.  And, ‘if the truth be told’ (a phrase that is a tad over used), I actually have sipped the ‘Kool-aid’.

So, I make my lists, I prioritize my tasks, and I follow-up on leads.  All the while alternating my thoughts between ‘what will become of me’, to ‘what will the future bring’?

Today, I have made the decision that although the road can be bumpy, I will wear steady shoes.  And, although the air is breezy, I will wear my windbreaker.  And because there are slippery hills, I will carry my walking stick. 

And even though I would like to stick my head under the covers and not come out, in the end, I will take head-on whatever life throws my way and I will laugh with God while I add a little sugar to my large glass of well-deserved lemonade.

The Apple Doesn't Fall Far From The Tree

Usually the expression, “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” is said in a negative way.  Children taking on the not-such good habits of their parents.

I feel fortunate that yesterday I got to experience this expression in a sweet, positive and affirming way.

I attended a Bat Mitzvah that has left me with thoughts and feelings of hope and respect for the generations to come.  Although I am on the outer circle of the family of the young lady, I have watched her grow from the stories her mother told and the Face Book pictures of family vacations and her accomplishments.

The Bat Mitzvah had no theme, there weren’t fancy decorations, there wasn’t a disc jockey, and it wasn’t a lavish party.  The food was simple yet delicious, and the hall was the recreation room in the community where they live.

What there was, was much love, warmth and genuine pride.  As I watched Ella read from the Torah, give her speech and receive her parent’s praise of the little girl who now approaches adulthood, I was almost spellbound.

Questions of how to parent.  Wondering what to say.  Wondering what to do.  The answer seemed almost too easy for me:  Be the kind of person you want your kids to be.  If you want them to be kind, be kind to others.  If you want them to be grateful, be grateful yourself.

Kids do not do what their parents say (as my dad believed), they do as they do.  They are little sponges.  They want to please.  They want to be just like you.

Would you really want a mini-you?  Think about it, because more likely than not, “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”.

Always On My Mind

This song made famous by Willie Nelson brings to mind relationships.  I have always associated it with girlfriend, boyfriend kinds.

I was watching the show The Voice, and a young woman chose to sing it, and said she dedicated it to her grandmother who passed away four years ago.  She said, with tears, that she didn’t spend enough time with her.

I felt badly for her.  There is no question she loved her grandmother.  And, she probably was a good granddaughter.  The truth is we are all very busy.  Work, school, friends, activities, etc. keep us with little time left at the end of the day.

Although we are a culture that buys the latest toys, wants the latest technology, and are always replacing our old gadgets with new ones, the people in our lives are NOT replaceable, and won’t be around forever.

The other day a friend and I stopped by an assisted living facility.  Although we were there for another reason, her best friend, who passed away several years ago has a mother who lives there.  Since we were there anyway, she looked her up and spent about 20 minutes with her.  It had been a very long time since she had seen her, although she lives only five minutes away.

Tears on both sides were shed as they talked, hugged and reminisced about the past.  My friend has committed to visiting more regularly.  Her friend’s mother got so much out of the visit.  I think, perhaps, my friend got more.

A Life Well-Lived

A very close friend of mine recently lost her mother.  In recent conversations with her regarding the funeral, memorial service and her tremendous sadness and loss I sent her an email where I wrote that her mother had a life well-lived.

I wonder how many people can truly say that about themselves. 

I would like to think when my time comes that my life was well-lived.  But, what does that really mean?

I guess we all have to define that for ourselves.  For some, it will be how much wealth they accumulated, for others it will be how much they contributed.  And, for others it will simply be getting through the challenges and demands that life brings.

At various times of my life, I would have answered this question differently.  I have come to realize that what is most important to me now is to leave this life feeling like I gave back more than I received.

Although I know it sounds like a cliché, it truly is how I feel.  I would like to look back over my decades on this earth and know that I gave as good as I got. 

It is never too late to take stock of your life.  It is never too soon to evaluate your personal checking account.

When your time comes, will people say that your life was well-lived?  Would you say that about yourself?